Our story so far.
A too large family’s king-dad goes postal and vows to kill his 12 sons if a daughter is born to his wife. Queenie doesn’t take this lying down, although the coffins have been constructed equipped with little pillows. She grabs her youngest, the ubiquitous Benjamin (also the name of the Dustin Hoffman character in “the Graduate”) and shows him the caskets. He flips, tells the brothers and they bounce to the forest and take shelter in an enchanted lodge. They’re mad though and vow to kill any girl they see.
Daughter is born and the red lantern (oops) I mean the red flag is raised.
The princess grows up and she’s lovely and nice and all that good stuff that only children often are (there are exceptions, but generally we, I mean, they are a completely wonderful group of people and NOT narcissistic or unduly weird as is often said about them). But she wonders, what the heck is up, when she sees these 12 boys Lacoste shirts on the clothesline (why they were being laundered at this stage is anyone’s guess – perhaps the castle was planning a garage sale).
So she asks Queenie-Mom, and Mom shows her those gosh darned coffins and pillows, which are gathering dust in the attic, but which are not part of the garage sale. Mom tells about the boys, and off the princess goes to find them, because she’s highly responsible and self-realized despite her screwed up parents.
She finds the enchanted lodge in the Magic Mountains. Thank goodness, little Benjamin is there, and he hides her under the bed when the big boys come home after shooting at some food (not finding any bubbling crude), and then he tricks them into saying they won’t kill any girls, and she jumps out from her hiding place and it’s a very nice reunion for the brothers and sister. They have a feast of ice-cream sandwiches and soda pop and wholesome things like macaroni and cheese with lobster flown in from Maine (remember they ARE rich).
And so begins a happy Snow-White-ish sort of life for the Princess and her Brothers, who go out doing manly things (no more sewing!), while she sweeps up.
But then something creepy happens.
The princess goes out in the garden and sees some lovely lilies growing there. And she – being brought up very kind and having taken flower arranging at Princess School – picks the flowers to put in a nice vase on the dining room table, because we all know how boys who shoot animals and like to kill girls appreciate that sort of thing.
The nice chalet disappears. Benjamin disappears too, and suddenly 12 ravens fly over her head.
And an old lady is yelling at the girl saying, “What have you DONE?”
Stay tuned for a special Terrific Tuesday edition of Magically Real to find out the exciting and completely surprising conclusion to this story.